arcee

there are nights i question my decision to join the police force. looking at myself with a rather large black eye, tonight is one of those nights.

If I was an autobot still, I would burn this entire town to the ground with all of those terrible men inside.

....No, I would not. I know that. I doesn't make this feel good or right. I cannot tell Ironhide what was done to me. He truly would burn this town to the ground, I think. I hope so and I know that's wicked to think but i like knowing that there is someone in this world that cares that much about me. I no longer am confused about why Chromia and he were so close.

I miss my sisters. I miss the other Autobots.

I do not think i like this town anymore.

We haven't heard much more about those killer robots.  They can't be Decepticons. Decepticons would have leveled the town by now. Which begs the question, what are they really? I mean, there are only so many things that they could be. I don't know.  i hate thinking about it. It makes me feel like I'm back home during the war.

I'm just so tired of fighting all the time. It's fun and I'm good at it but sometimes I just feel like I'm so so old. I can't talk to Ironhide or Optimus, they would just make me feel like I was being ridiculous. I am being ridiculous but I can't help how I'm feeling. I think my human emotions are getting more pronounced. I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a very bad thing. I suppose it's a bit of both really.

I need ice cream. Chocolate. I hope Ironhide went to get groceries.

Whatever this new thing is, I do not like it. Messing with plan mirrors is fine but Bumblebee is a living thing.  Whoever did this did not cause an annoyance, they hurt him. I hate this town sometimes. the mirror cut my hand. it feels so weird.

I have a lot of work to do and no desire to do it. I just want to sit in my pajamas and watch terrible late night television. Or take a bath. I think I'll do that. One of the perks of being a human. Baths really are quite nice.

My hair is getting so long. I've stopped cutting it because it just keeps coming back. It's giving me such a headache and I cannot do anything but sit here and try and keep it from completely suffocating me.

I think Ironhide is laughing at me. It's not funny, it's down well past my feet Every time I try to walk, I STEP ON IT!

i hate not being able to do anything. I am not helpless.

I need more women friends, I think. I am in need of more clothes and I am terrible at shopping alone and MIkeala is busy with school.

How does one go about getting friends? All of my current friends just...happened to already be willing to befriend me. I am not exactly the best at socializing. I am awkward and strange and not nearly as good at adapting to humanity as Chromia has been.  i'm not always so sure why Ironhide chose to stay with me instead of going back to her.

Anyway, I need to get ready to go to work. I feel as though I spend most of my time at work these days. I understand the necessity, so much clean up to do after that terrible plague.

so many dead. it's beginning to feel like our war all over again. i can't even imagine that level of destruction here in such a young planet. We cannot allow it. I won't allow them to suffer the same fate as our dear planet.